The characters of Samaria Gorge

There were some wonderful moments in Samaria gorge.

You know, when it was just me, my wife, my friends, the wonder of nature, and that really annoying bloke just up ahead whistling "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" really loudly.

We came across two very special characters though - "Bend your knees" man, and Bumgirl.

"Bend your knees" man distinguished himself by getting behind me at one of the bits where you had to climb uphill a bit, and taking it upon himself to criticise my walking style.

"Bend your knees more. That's it. It isn't hard mate" he said from behind me in broad cockney.

Had I retained any breath at this point, I would have given him a mouthful of broad cockney back.

Still I consoled myself with the fact that I might not have a gorge walking technique to his satisfaction, but he didn't appear to have any mates, as every time we saw him he was on his own.

The second recurring character of the day was Bumgirl.

She was this rather strange twittering creature, who would every now and then push past you as if she were on a mission to speed-walk the gorge in record time. Then you'd overtake her at a rest stop or spring, and then five minutes later she would be breathlessly pushing past you on a narrow track again as if her life depended upon her.

Her chief distinguishing feature was that she was wearing a summer dress that was too short to cover her bum. Like, really too short. In a way that would make people think she was under-dressed on the beach, let alone whilst doing a 13km hike through rough terrain.

Maybe that was why she was in such a hurry - she was looking for her lost trousers?